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We wanna teach you how to fart in public.
We wanna do so, by asking you a question;

Do you ever have to fart on a bus, or in an airplane or in some public place?

But, you hadn't been farting all day! So you really didn't know the nature of the beast. You only knew there was lots of it...

In a situation like that,
what you have to do, is to release a TESTFART.

Release.....quietly....and in a carefully controlled manner, about 10 to 15 procent of the total fart. In order to determine of those around you can handle it or if in fact you cause a critical situation for public health.

Be aware, a fart could end a marriage, scare away your mother-in-law or could cause that everyone around you heads for the exits, even the people on the airplane.

So....be carefull when you fart!

For the ones who got now more interested in the world of farting...

Dictionary
of
Farts

Ofcourse there are thousands of them, but these are the most released ones!

common fart
anxious fart
coughing fart
wet fart
blower
tight bun fart
the ripper

THE COMMON FART
> The Common Fart is the fart heard most often. It is a very close relative of the "Ripper", but is released with less force. It is usually heard in groups where people aren't yet comfortable with farting amongst each other. Therefore, one person in the group gets up some nerve and releases this common-sounding fart in such a manner that everyone now feels comfortable with group flatulence.. Usually there is no smell with the Common Fart.

THE ANXIOUS FART
> The Anxious Fart is let in a place where someone does not want the fart to be heard. You may have seen men and women in book stores or grocery stores, or even on the street, letting these farts. They are generally controlled, usually barely audible, and require much skill to master.

THE COUGHING FART
> The Coughing Fart is one that the farter tries to cover up with a cough. My dad used to let these farts all the time when he worked at the Bingo Hall. He would stand at the back of the hall and cough, just as a nice "common fart" was let. It can be embarrassing for the farter, and those around the farter, if the timing is off at all, or if the fart is longer than anticipated.

THE WET FART
> The Wet Fart is one that sounds quite juicy. Quite often this fart is cause for alarm, and an indication that a trip to the toilet is imminent.

THE BLOWER
> This fart is similar to the ripper, except it has a bit of a hollow, windy sound to it. This is due to farter blowing all the gas out quickly. This fart will almost always get a laugh.

TIGHT BUN FART
> This fart is always recognizable. It sounds like the farter's buns were so tight that he/she was in pain while farting.

THE RIPPER
> One of the best farts around is The Ripper. It is loud, rough, and always raises an eyebrow or two. Characteristics of The Ripper often show up in other farts, but make no mistake - this fart is a single, powerful gas-bubble that comes screaming from the farter's butt.